4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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