Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
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How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
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Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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