Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize