So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
