Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
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