dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
"it" just moved
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Randomize
