I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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