This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize
