I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize