My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
