i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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