VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
