Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Randomize
