They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
