i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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