He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Randomize
