I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
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