please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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