hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
You're completely useless in the revolution.
We got so high we made milksteak
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
