I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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