just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
