I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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