I seem to have left my pride at pride
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
he just fucked me for my cheese..
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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