I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
The power of my boobs compel you
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Randomize
