Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Randomize
