Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize