i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
farters have to be the big spoon...
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
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