yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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