Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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