I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Randomize
