dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
