You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
