I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Shame - the story of my life.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
