I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
