That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
