All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
