so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
