they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
He? As in you personified your dick?
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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