At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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