Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Randomize
