dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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