it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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