there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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