16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize
