question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
im holly from the hills drunk
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
