i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
