did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
me + whiskey = a bad person
I feel like a drive thru vagina
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
