Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Randomize
