I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
