The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
