i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
